The Pageant

Once upon a time, there was a Jaguar named Sally. Well, Sally was a beautiful animal, what with all her spots. Her spots were the prettiest spots of all the animal`s spots. While the other animals had plain brown or tan, Sally`s spots were a thick brown color which blended in perfectly with her natural tan fur, the color of a wonderful aging book. One day in the rain forest, Sally noticed a sign for a beauty pageant. All the lady animals in the rain forest had already signed up. "I do not brag," Sally told herself. "But I want the $2,000 reward, so I will sign up." She found a pen and wrote "Sally Jaguar" on the line provided on the sign-up sheet. Two days later, Sally found herself nervous. "What if I don`t win?" she repeated in her mind. For the 4th time she had to remind herself that this was only a silly contest, for fun. She laughed it off. At the Big Bowl (the arena where the pageant was taking place) Sally took 10 deep breaths and walked onto the catwalk. She heard the crowd cheering but did not look up. She walked back to the back of the stage and changed into a pink dress. She used all her cloths only once for 3 minutes. First, she wore nothing. She was 100% natural, how she liked it. After the pink dress she wore a black tank top with jean shorts and cowgirl boots. Next she wore a blue shirt and blue pants- 98% retro and 2% itchy! She wore jeans in various colors and shirts in various colors for the next 5 rounds. She then wore her PJs- a pink poka dotted long-sleeved shirt and blue polka dotted pajama pants. This was the final round- the question round. She was naked again as she walked on the catwalk. The narrator and the person who asks the question was a male cougar in his late 50s with bluish-reddish spots and purplish-brownish skin. He was on the news the day before- the headline was "59 Year-Old Cougar Has Non-Contagious Rare Disease: Turns Fur & Spots the Color of a Bruise. Gross, but True!". "What do you have to say about global warming?" he asked Sally. Sally thought of her vacation 5 years ago to North Carolina during the winter. She imagined snow. "Snow in the rain forest is just not right.". She left the catwalk. She could hear the cougar from the other side of the curtain. "And the winner is....SALLY JAGUAR!!!!" Sally blushed and almost ran to where the cougar was with her prize. At her home, she placed the 3-foot tall trophy on her mantel and donated the money to charity. She had won the prize, but the accomplishment feeling mattered most to Sally. She smiled as as she read her name on the engraving and laughed when they wrote "Jagur". Sally could not feel more proud of herself.